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If you have not already read it, read Part 1 here.

Wedding of the year part 2

Kev decided he did not want to choose which of his friends who would be best man. Instead, we would play one hand of poker and the winner would take responsibility. It was irrelevant really as in any situation like this, Julian was bound to win. Simon Nowab was not present so Kev played for him. To add spice to the situation, Padraig had come up with the idea that whoever came last would be the flower girl. Everyone had agreed to this in my absence, knowing full well I was all but nailed on to get this honour.

Arguments erupt as its announced a rematch

I insisted on a new rule, should anyone tie for either first of last place everyone was back in.

The cards were dealt and I was obviously thrilled to see pocket jacks. This was almost like a freeroll, it’s impossible to come last from here. Surely!

I was right and I duly went on to win it. Unfortunately irony was to play its part. Kev, playing for Simon and Padraig, both came joint last. They both had Q8 suited and neither improved with the board, despite Padraig flopping a juicy flush and straight draw. We would all have to play another hand. Doh! Damn my fair play rule change.

I insisted the button move and was reasonable happy with the K10 I was dealt. I wasn’t out of the woods however. By the turn I had made a pair. Julian obviously already had the thing locked up with a flush or straight or summut but if the queen of spades came on the river, I would be stone last. Normally in this situation a one outer would be 35-1 but with my fate in the balance it was probably be nearer even money. Thankfully I was spared when a jack came to my rescue.

Irony had played yet another part. Padraig had missed all his draws. He would have the honour of carrying Leona’s bouquet. He complained that the button should not have moved but no one was willing to replay the hand. I accompanied Padraig in the casino bar till around 5am helping him drown his sorrows.

As I had blown all my money by night 2, mainly due to a strategically placed craps table, he lectured me on the benefits of bankroll management. He told me to stop playing the side tables and concentrate on poker. I have an edge at that. Despite the fact we had way too much to drink he was making a lot of sense and at this point I agreed to never touch the tables again. He talked me into going to Vegas for the entire world series and to have a shot at as many events as possible.

Veronique and Julian Colsole Padraig after his loss

The following night, Kerry recommended a restaurant by the sea called Fisherman’s Wharf. When we arrived It was not the most salubrious of surroundings and Kerry promptly informed us it was not her 1^st choice and she couldn’t get us in the other place. She needn’t have worried, this was the Caribbean not London Mayfair, nobody expected the Dorchester. The food was tremendous and I would recommend the place if you are ever out that way,  (that is of course, if the place is called the Fisherman’s Wharf. I can’t actually remember but Bev assures me every Caribbean Island has a restaurant called the Fisherman’s Wharf so I’m sticking with it. Kev, maybe you could confirm in the comments when you read this, if you haven’t fallen out with me for posting this that is)

Simon Nowab makes his usual late arrival. Not to the restaurant but to the island. He’d flown in a few days later. Rather than going straight to the hotel to check in, we told him to meet us at the restaurant. A little flustered, he explained how he had missed his connection in Antigua. It had cost him the best part of 400 bucks to get another for the short journey over to St. Kitts. To add insult to injury, while waiting for his new flight he thought he would take the opportunity to have a cigarette. After passing through security and enjoying his vitamin N, he was forced to pay a further $25 departure tax before being allowed back in. Oh well, any smoker will tell you that 25 bucks is cheap for a ciggy after being deprived of one for 7 or 8 hours.

We arrive back at the hotel and I was secretly pleased everyone was talking about having an early night. Last night’s session with Padraig was still taking it’s toll. I agreed and said 2 drinks and I’m off to bed.

Simon whined on how it was his first night an insisted we stayed and drank with him. He then dragged me kicking and screaming to the roulette table to blow another 200 bucks. Oh well, 16hours without gambling is not a record, but it was a reasonable start. A few minute later Simon went to the toilet and never came back. The lightweight was drinking bottled water anyway.

Obviously some 8 hours later me and Padraig were asked to leave by the barman. All the other staff had gone to bed and he would like to join them.

 Come back for exclusive pics of the wedding, including Padraig with flowers in his hair. An achievement in it self.

 

Although Kila and I have been playing poker for a relatively short period of our lives we have met some of the best friends anyone could be lucky enough to have. I have never been one to judge friends by how long I have known them, simply by how w ell you get along and what you are prepared to do for each other.

Two such friends are Kevin O’Connell and his long suffering girlfriend Leona. We first met back in 2004 on the very first Ladbrokes cruise. They had not long been seeing each other.

Obviously when Kev finally proposed back in August of last year we knew we wouldn’t be missing the wedding.

I am sure their home town of Burnley, just a short drive from where we live would have a suitable registry office, however Kev is not one to do thing the easy way.

We would obviously change any plans made in order to attend the big do so when he told us it was in the Caribbean island paradise of St. Kitts with lots of booze the RSVP wasn’t long in coming. (to be honest the booze bit did it for me)

Along with Kev and Leona we were to be joined by Jessie and Mickey May, Julian Gardener and his good lady Kerry, Adam O’Connell, Kirsty Thomson and Leona’s sister Philena. Padraig Parkinson and his better half Veronique had set off a few days earlier and were waiting there for us.

Flights to the Caribbean are never easy. Thankfully Ryan Air don’t travel there and although BA are considerably better, 12 hours in a plane is very unappealing. Besides, the plane was to stop on route in Antigua and if you ever do go to the West Indies do not expect prompt departures.

“Hey Mon, what u in an urry fer, da sun is shinning it’s a wondafool daaay. Chiiiiiiilllllllll., We will set off when we ready”

St kitts Sunset , my favourite time of day

Luckily we got to the airport early and managed an upgrade to premium economy for 150 quid. Bargain! I rang Jessie who dashed over from his hotel to check in ASAP but to no avail. They were sold out. However the plane was pretty quiet and everyone in economy got 3 seats each. DOH!

As expected we sat at Antigua for several hours longer than expected. Ok not longer than expected but longer than we were scheduled for. St Kitts was a mere 20 minutes flight from there and when we arrived it was beginning to go dark. THANK THE LORD! It was hot as a bitch and in an un-air conditioned airport it took us forever to get through immigration. How long does it take to look at a passport photo, a quick look at the person who handed it you, grab a rubber stamp and hit one of the pages with it. I can only assume the people who check the passports also unload the baggage but eventually they arrived and we all clambered though the door for our well deserved cigarettes. Jessie explained that to survive a Caribbean experience you just not gotta fight it. Slow down and except everything will take time, this is quite to opposite to a Vegas trip.

We stopped at the Marriot Hotel and Golf resort and which had several restaurants. After the compulsory gallon of strawberry daiquiri we decided to check out the steakhouse. It was tremendous, and it only took an hour an a half to get served.

We had only been on the island a few hours and Julian had already found his supply of  Caribbean herbal refreshment. He was not going to struggle getting into the swing of how things are done.

The next day we decided to take the trip to the local beach. The resort had it’s own beach but there were a few bars down the road and it seemed like a good place to start the week.

Now me and sunshine don’t get on well. In fact we avoid spending time together as much as possible. In the past I have had sunstroke from choosing post cards. I use sun factor 2000 and swap seats on the bus whenever it  turns a corner. Luckily we found a beach hut masquerading as a bar and I was able to stay sheltered. I am proud of my white pasty skin. No matter what country I travel too I come back the same colour, milk bottle white. Besides in the past I have attempted to join the bronzed body brigade. I go pillar box red, peel then back to brilliant white. It achieves nothing but a few days pain and a bed full of lost skin. I must have lost a stone in weight.

Honest skalie's crazy horse racing game

As the sun began to fade and the temperature dropped to a chilly 35 ºC the rest made their way to the bar for a few rounds of “Honest Skalie’s crazy horse racing game”. (featured in previous articles like the Galway and Irish open reports).

Basically it’s a horse race using the aces from a deck of cards. I lay prices on which will win and the mugs punters place their bets.

The first race starts with Clubs even money, diamonds and spades are 5/2 and hearts 6/1. Kev shouts “I WANT 2-1 ON SPADES”.

“Kev spades are 5/2″

“I WANT 2 TO 1″ he said even more demandingly.

“OK, you drive a hard bargain mate you get 2/1″

In the mean time Leona wants 20 bucks on hearts. Kev goes mad and tells her it has no chance, demanding she backs something else, which she does.

Hearts romp home, Kev you truly are one of my best friends.

Come back to see who won the illustrious honour of flower girl.

Ok some of you have seen these before, but they are too good not to be seen again.

The genius of Matt Broughton

A Song for Dave Ulliott

Fast Tube by Casper

A song for Lucy Rokach

Fast Tube by Casper

A song for Simon Trumper

Fast Tube by Casper

I use a reletively has res on my laptops and home PC’s computor screens and use internet explorer.

I need feed back on how the site reads for most people. I will alter the lay out if enough people require it.

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